My Little Moment of Zen, A Shameless Plug, and a "Small" Crisis


Moment of Zen. Please, my German speaking friends, enjoy the oh-so-many things wrong with this KFC-Frankfurt a.M. poster. If I need to get Sandra to laugh, all I need is to whisper in her ear "Donnerstag ist Chickentag."

As for the shameless plug, anyone that has not seen my dear friend Lyam White act (and who lives in the greater Seattle area) you all have an amazing opportunity. Lyam just got cast as the title role in Shakespeare's Titus Andronicus (read his blog comments here), a production by the new company in town, Balagan Theater. Although not for the faint of heart (one famous stage direction from Willy himself says "Enter the empress' sons with Lavinia, her hands cut off, and her tongue cut out, and ravished." (Act II, scene IV)), the challenge of such horror in great theater is sometimes worth the effort in and of itself. Add to that the fact the Lyam is someone that should be seen onstage, and you have a party (best taken, admittedly, with stiff chasers afterwards.)

In other quick personal news on the Projekt Berlin front, Sandra and I had a bit of a financial crisis last week. It is critical for us to enter our new life in Germany debt free, and as we performed an exhausting (sic) review of finances, we had to look at each other and say, "I don't think we have enough money to actually do this in '07." There was no panic, just thoughtful consideration-- a fact that by itself I find quite extraordinary. We calculated at that time that we would have enough to pay off all debts, top to bottom, but that that would be about it.

One day later, however, we realized that it actually didn't matter. I mean, it matters, but (thanks again Carolyn Myss) if there was ever a time to understand how we manifest our own future, it was this time. If one gives oneself an "out," your subconscious will work really hard to manifest that reality which holds the less resistance. I know many of you out there still don't actually buy the fact that we are doing this. Maybe this is one of those gut checks where we not only review how serious we are to ourselves, but can look everyone else square and say, without tremour or waiver, we are serious.

We admitted with new words and new intention that we needed to be in Berlin-- we needed to continue without compromise on the path that we have chosen (and which has chosen us.) If we both truly do believe in what we are doing (which we do without measure) then the answer is always right there -- we continue to work, save, apply for scholarship, solicit donations . . . whatever it takes within ethical and sane bounds. When I moved to Seattle 3 1/2 years ago, I drove across country with no job, a nebulous future, few friends, and unhealed relationships with relatives-- All I had was a cat, a clarinet, a car I'd bought off of E-bay for $400, and the generosity of a close friend with an offered futon and apartment to share until I found my legs. Look at what has happened since: the most amazing partner in the world, discovery of an amazing path, a great job to move me from "then" to "now," many new friendships and deepening of old ones, healing of family bonds . . .

Could I actually allow for anything less then this on this next path?

Happy Hanukkah, Quanza, Christmas, Solstice, and (of course) Festivus for all of you out there.

Paul

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